Quiet people have the loudest mind.

Stephen Hawking

Understanding and effective communication are important tools for a healthy relationship.

Personality differences can sometimes be the bane of a relationship. But a willingness to learn and unlearn will influence a positive outcome.

I have written down 37 things I know about introverts. It took a number of experiences, research and instrospection to fully process and pen these down.

The main aim is to educate you, especially if you find it frustrating relating with introverts, and hopefully help you enjoy a better relationship.

I wish to point out that as an introvert, you can train yourself to improve in certain areas. For example, being in public, especially when necessary,  can be better managed when you train yourself in navigating the crowd even if it requires extra effort. In relationships, parties involved should be open to healthy compromise. Understand each other and endeavour to meet the other person midway.

So let’s go on to the 37 things you should know about introverts!

 

•  We can be genuinely happy for you without the paparazzi.

•  We will choose indoors whenever we can.

•  Being in a crowd isn’t our favourite thing.

•  Talking is a full time job.

•  We are very attentive to detail and hardly miss an emotion.

•  We are faithful friends and companions that’s why we take our time before allowing you past the line.

•  We will choose quality over quantity, especially in relationships.

•  We may be “slow” but usually come up with the most brilliant ideas because we spend time scrutinizing the options.

•  We want to be alone sometimes just means we need to recharge. Give me that alone-time and see what a darling you’ll have on my return.

•  Small talk weary us. We enjoy deep conversations.

•  Respect the boundaries.

•  We don’t exactly find public surprises exciting.

•  We take the award for best listener. Kindly bear with us when you do most of the talking. You score double points when you genuinely listen to what we have to say when we have something to say.

•  Trying to bring us out of our shell isn’t the best approach. Instead, try to make sure we are comfortable within a space then see us shine bright like a diamond.
  Comfort here is more about the people in that space.

•  Spend time – quality time, that’s how we bond. We spend time with those we care about. It’s one of our most valuable currency.

•  Once we open up to you, know you are very important to us and vice versa. This takes a while but if you cross this stage you’re most likely part of our inner circle.

•  We are usually trustworthy.

•  Appreciate and respect our introvertedness.

•  Expressing our feelings verbally usually requires extra effort.

•  We find deception VERY appalling. I can accept a flaw you’re straight with but never facades.

•  Win our trust and be wowed by all the sweetness we have to offer.

•  The energy we save is often channeled into our creativity.

•  We are often very confident in and okay with our introverted nature.

•  Our ability to think deep helps us see beauty in and deeply appreciate ordinary things.

•  You may be right about our being slow sometimes because we come up with a perfect reply only after the confrontation is long over. Very frustrating!

•  We do not like to be put on the spot. Keep me informed well ahead.

•  We aren’t exactly shy.

• If we open our space to you every time then you really are an insider; actually, a stakeholder.

•  We enjoy chilling with our thoughts. We aren’t crazy, we just find it refreshing.

• Sharing our quiet moment with you is a deep level of intimacy.

•  It’s not that we do not wish to tell you what’s wrong, rather we need to process and understand it first before putting it into words. We don’t like confrontation.

•  We shut down completely when the crowd is too large and loud.

•  If you want essence, engage us in a one-on-one conversation. Whoosh!

•  “Better being alone than in company of wrong vibes” is our mantra.

•  We give attention and thrive on it as well.

• We don’t like being lonely, we just appreciate being alone sometimes.

•  We are not antisocial, we just enjoy being with fewer people.

Does any of these sound familiar to you? What would you like to add? Are you an extrovert and see things differently? Share your thoughts in the comment section. I’d like to hear from you!

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Yours cherrily,

Debbie